Cliche New Years Post

Oh look! Another article in your news feed about how to better yourself in 2015. “Fifteen ways to be happier in 2015.” “Fifty Resolutions You Should be Making This Year.” “The Top 10 Resolutions to Make for Next Year.” You can be a journalist, or even a blogger, and have your own writing style without using a list for every single article you write.

#overit #endrant

I’m not making any resolutions this year. That’s right, I’m so awesome already, I don’t need to change myself. Not really, I just think about last year at this time when I made my resolutions, and the year before that, and the year before that. And how they never happened. And how they’re always the same.

1. Lose weight.
2. Stop biting my nails.
3. Exercise more.
4. Eat healthier.
5. Pray more.

[It’s really sad that “pray more” is at the bottom of that list below losing weight and biting my nails. Probably if that were at the top of the list I wouldn’t need anything else on the list.]

None of these things about me have changed over the last several years. My weight and routines have fluctuated but I am still the same person. New Years Resolutions don’t drastically change who you are just because the date on the calendar changes. You change because of things that happen to you over the course of that year, things that you have NO control over.

I sat down last December, much like in years’ past, and told myself I would lose weight, blind to what God and the universe actually had in store for me for 2014. A stress fracture in my foot, a new job, and most recently, a car accident.

Sometimes it feels like the more determined you are to do something, the more obstacles you find standing in your way. Just when I hit a great momentum of motivation I am stopped in my tracks. The accident left me with a concussion, back pain, a gastrointestinal bleed, and a ulcer (in a nutshell). Last night was my first night exercising in 20 days. The longest I’ve gone since my stress fracture. And there’s not much more discouraging than trying to work out in the gym when you feel tired, fat, and unmotivated.

Spoiler alert: people think that a new year means a new start, but the reality is your life continues the way it’s been going! You can’t change yourself, but you CAN change your attitude. Maybe 2014 wasn’t so shiny for you, I feel ya, man. But 2015 might be better for us if we change our attitudes and outlooks. It really sucks to get back in the gym after 20 days of not working out, but exercise is always the better choice than sitting on your fat ass at home! And sure, life may not always go as you plan, maybe you got laid off or got broken up with, but you know damn well those things always turn into something better down the road. I got into a car accident and got a brand new car, see? Case in point! So keep on truckin’ friend, headstrong into 2015.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

The Holiday Work Struggle: A Poem.

‘Twas ten days ’til Christmas and all through my office

Were chocolates and cookies and goodies among us

I sit at my desk meal planning and gym scheduling

Only to be showered with gifts and kind gesturing

Gift givers skipping and smiling as they leave

Feeling joyful and triumphant about their good deeds

My grin turns to grimace as the door slowly closes

Knowing the willpower to come will come in large doses

How many calories in two chocolate truffles?

Do I have to count the candy cane and cookie crumbles?

I’ll have to leave work early and wake up before eight

And then run as fast as I can for about three days straight

Maybe if I Christmas shop for an entire day

I’ll burn off that one piece of fudge I’ve been saving for Friday

Then I’ll diet all weekend to prepare for the new week

Because Monday will for sure bring a new treat

Happy Holidays!

Getting Over It

Being an adult is like, the worst thing ever. Seriously.

 

How do we become so convinced that waking up before sunrise, putting on uncomfortable clothes, and driving to a job where we do just about the same thing every day is going to be THE GREATEST THING EVER!?!? That was my mindset in high school and college anyways. I used to think that by the time I was 25 I would be living in New York City working some really glamorous job like managing a fashion magazine. I turn 25 in two months and I’m nowhere close to that, and I think it’s because one thing that causes you to be an adult is drive and discipline. And I just don’t usually have those things. That’s hard for me to admit because I know I CAN work hard, sometimes I just choose not to.

 

My bed is just so fantastic. When my alarm goes off in the morning, no matter what time it is, I hate it. I loathe my alarm with every ounce of my being. My mom used to set the vacuum in my room and turn it on and walk out, granted it was about 2:00 in the afternoon and I was still sleeping. These days I find myself waking up to a 5:30am alarm to go to the gym, and SPIN for that matter! What the heck is wrong with me. I woke up at 5am last weekend to run 6 miles with 40,000 people. So many people. So much running. So early. So. So. Early.

 

Pretty cool though right?!?! They have a saying that goes with the Bridge Run that’s “Get Over It!” Super corny but, sometimes you really do just have to suck it up and get over it. And I did, and I have been continuing to find the adult in myself and stop whining about how I hate mornings and just get over it and go to the gym. Well, I will probably always whine about mornings but at least my boyfriend calls me a lazy slob a lot less when I get up at the same time he does to work out.

 

On a side note, three days after I ran the super cool Bridge Run, I found out I had a stress fracture in my foot! That’s what I get for not training and pushing myself too hard. So for a few weeks I am limited to only spin classes and upper body workouts, but I’m just going to get over it and do the best I can. I’ve gotten back to the point where if I skip a day at the gym I feel miserable and disgusting. That’s a great place to be because you don’t dread working out every day, you actually feel better and almost look forward to it. Almost. Holding yourself accountable works way better than any friend holding you accountable, once you start feeling guilty about not working out you’re on the right track. So glad I’m back on that track.

 

I don’t know if I will be at my peak of fitness by summer, but at this point I’m happy with myself for trying to be healthier and learning about how to take better care of my body. Find your reason to get up before sunrise and the workout will be worth it! Even if it’s so that you can drink beer that night…..yes, that’s my motivation most days.

A New Struggle

As if THE Struggle wasn’t enough, I had my free one-on-one consultation at my new gym last week. This should be motivating and uplifting right? WRONG. The trainer, Leslie, told me to stop eating carbs again. Just when I started thinking carbs were okay, she tells me “Allie, if you cut carbs out of your diet, I can guarantee you will see pounds fall off.” Well I’m not going to argue with a professional trainer.

Thankfully, I left for a mini-vacay in New York City the next day, which meant CHEAT WEEKEND!! And oh, did I cheat…burgers, fries, cheese, gnocchi, tacos, pizza, beer, liquor, and more beer (see pictures below, if you dare tempt yourself). I was fully prepared to gain at least 5 pounds once I got home. I didn’t factor in that we probably walked every street in Manhattan, so shockingly I didn’t gain any weight.

Chezz. Tacuzz. Ahmletzz. Pastuzz. Sugazz.

Monday morning I started this terrible, awful, no good, very bad diet, that consists of eggs and fruit for breakfast, a big salad for lunch, and lean meat and veggies for dinner. I am allowed to snack only on natural, unsalted nuts, fruit, and natural peanut butter. I am avoiding salt and sugar as much as possible. So naturally, I got to work today and saw a pack of saltines in the breakroom and ripped into them. They were stale and disappointing, it was a sign I suppose. Also, on Monday, a resident brought a dozen cookies into the office and placed them on my desk. I had one, there was no resisting. You tell me which one looks more appetizing:

Yea, that’s what I thought. You would cave too.

The good news here is that I have lost 3 pounds in the last 3 days on this terrible, awful, no good, very bad [but effective] diet. Leslie also talked me into unlimited spin classes, so by summer I’ll be Adriana Lima’s twin, y’all.

Breaking Point

Things that happened this week:

1. I started “lifting heavy.” RAWR.

2. I bought a fitness class groupon.

3. I joined a gym.

WHOA, ALLIE! That’s a lot of fitness-y things you did this week!

I know, thanks!

There comes a time in every woman’s life when she looks in the mirror and says, “THAT’S IT MAN! I’m not gonna look like this anymore!” This special time has come more than once for me, I’d say this is probably the third time I’ve had one of those serious talks with myself. Better late (or again) than never!

I read this post last week, and decided to try it out. This girl sounds like she knows what she’s talking about, and I want to look beefy, okay? Not really, I just want to be healthy and get in shape, and I agree 100% with her entire post. So on Monday I started trying to “lift heavy” like she talks about, which basically  meant using more weight on the machines in my tiny gym at my apartment complex. I felt a little sore after a couple days, #winning. Then I found this groupon thingy for 30 fitness classes for 20 bucks!! So I bought it, of course.

I was supposed to get 10 classes from a gym just down the street from me, so I signed up for one, printed my voucher and marched in there at 8:15 ON MY DAY OFF, yup. They informed me that they weren’t honoring the groupon anymore, but that I could still attend the class that day and they would give me a couple more to make up for it. (Awesome, right? By the way, the gym is Chucktown Fitness and I highly recommend it!)  The class kicked my booty and on top of that every staff member working knew my name by the time I walked out the door. And no, that’s not because I was so uncoordinated or just incredibly awesome at the workout, they are just super nice. (But for the record, I was incredibly awesome at the workout, the trainer told me so.)

I was so overwhelmingly impressed by this gym that I actually went back the next day and joined! And it gets better…I went to ask a trainer to show me how to do something and he worked with me one-on-one for 30 minutes until I couldn’t walk anymore. Lunges for days.

Today I feel like I’ve put in such effort this week, and not just because my legs are sore every time I move them, along with my triceps, but because my whole mentality has changed (besides the pizza I ate last night). I keep wanting to see a change in the scale or in my measurements but I know that’s unrealistic. I’m going to have to have many more weeks like this one and slowly things will change and I will feel better and better about myself! After all, it’s not for anyone but myself and my body. Fitness should be self-improvement, not comparing yourself to others and setting goals based on how someone else’s body looks.

Bottom line is, I hope I want to put on my bikini in May. Fat chance, sista, but we gon’ keep workin’.